So it’s 1am Friday morning and I haven’t gone to bed yet. I do this time and again. Why you ask? Because on nights that John goes to bed early, it’s 3-4 hours of alone time. Like actually 100% alone time because even Tilly is sleeping. Motherhood is a strange thing. Before becoming a mom I hated being alone. I never shopped alone, I always wanted someone else’s opinion. I didn’t like being home alone, which was a factor in getting our dog. We shared one vehicle for a while and I loved it because I didn’t even have to drive alone.
It’s true what they say. You never miss it until it’s gone.
I can remember the first time I realized this. Henry was our only child and I liked to keep him with me. Until a particularly bad teething phase occurred and he wanted to nurse constantly. A bottle wouldn’t comfort him the same. I suddenly felt so…trapped (not the right word, but close). And I remember crying and yelling at John “I’m never alone! I just want to be ALONE…and I hate being alone!” So crazy.
But motherhood is kinda like that. It brings out strange parts of you, both the good and the bad.
But anyways, onto life lately.
1) I’m staying up way too late all the time because I like having a little alone time now. Without Family around, it’s kinda my only option.
2) Tilly is teething already. Poor Lady. It must be so painful. And since I’m staying up through her good long stretch of sleep, her frequent wake up in the wee hours of the morning are killing me. It’s my own fault.
3) William had croup. Like midnight-trip-to-the-Children’s-Hospital-Croup. He was fine after the medication they gave him. But man, breathing stuff is terrifying.
4) Henry is still 3 and a half years old. Limit pusher to the max. I’m excited for that stage to end (it ends right?). But he also is so sweet and says the most intelligent things! And he’s so creative and clever.
5) John. I feel like I should mention him. He’s still working his butt off so I can stay home with our kids. He took William to the Hospital on Croup night and then went to work the next day. Yes he is amazing but no, you can’t have him. He’s mine.